Confetti Wires
by Yella
Summary: Palex. My view on what would have happened if Paige hadn't ran after Alex. Don't worry Palex lovers.


Disclaimer: don't own Palex, I do own the fanfic.

Summary: Pretty much how things would have happened given the chance that Paige would have never ran after Alex. Time frame is a week after the Lexicon of Love part 2.

Confetti Wires

I had to make a presentation after all the drama with Alex and me. When we met laneway, I thought I'd clear up the fact that I was so not into girls. Apparently kissing her told us both I was wrong. My pride, however, had stopped me from telling her how I really felt, and telling Hazel how I really didn't. Alex would have been great for me. She would have understood me better than Spinner or Matt had, and I went, and I messed everything up. As always, I fucked it up again. When Mrs. H had chosen me to give a speech about the school shooting last year, I couldn't think of anything but Alex.

Of course, I told her I'd do it anyways. So there I was, in front of the whole student body, giving a speech about 'the shooting.'

"Our parents make up stories all our lives. They tell us about Santa Claus, his big sack of presents and if we're bad, the lump of coal that will be left in our stockings for the morning after, to show us right from wrong. The Easter Bunny was an excuse to make us dress up and go to church one day, and the Tooth Fairy was a ploy to get us to leave our removed k9's out for them to collect. They even told us school is a safe and a fun environment. Last year, that little white lie, which I had believed so long had been altered." I looked out to the crowd, removing my eyes from the note cards in my quivering hands. This had been the first time I looked out among them since I started, and I was becoming more and more panicked by the moment. But I was Paige. Queen Bee extraordinaire and Captain on the SS squad, so I could handle this. I was so wrong.

I saw Alex sitting in the middle of the crowd watching me intensely as she usually did when she thought I wasn't paying attention. But I had kept my eye on her for a week now, and watched her every reaction to me. A big part of me sunk when she noticed that I noticed her watching and she looked away. I continued on, "Even after the shooting, the teachers, and principal were still trying to make things better. My mom told me that things happen for reasons unseen to us, and I feel for that lie too. Things always happen for a reason, but it's up to us what we do about it." I stopped and realized that this speech was becoming more and more prevalent to my own relationship angst. "We fail at work, because we don't do it, or don't get it, we fail at friendships because we blame each other for everything or we aren't there enough. We fail at love..." I trailed for a second, rethinking my words on the script in front of me, "Uh, we fail in love because we're too blind to see when it's there, right under our noses." I stopped and realized I was staring directly at Alex at that line. Her eyes were gazing so impatiently into mine, as to say 'what are you waiting for?' I shifted my gaze nervously around the room, where Mrs. H and Mr. Simpson were staring at me and urging me to continue behind the curtain.

"I'm sorry, I can't—" I ran off stage, and people started clapping. I think they thought it was too emotional for me to talk about the shooting, but in honesty it was too much to bear for me to think about love. And in that case, Alex. I went into the girls' washroom and sat down in one of the stalls. I heard a few footsteps outside the washroom door, and then someone entering.

"Paige?" the person called out to me, and instantly I knew the voice.

"What Alex?" I called back impatiently. If she was going to see me cry, I wanted her to think I could at least keep my convictions about us.

"I was just…well, I was worried. You seemed really emotional about the speech. And I understand, the shooting was intense." She stopped rambling and I thought it was because she had run out of things to mask the truth.

"You know damn well that it was about you," I whispered under my breath, hoping to god she didn't hear me.

After a good ten minutes or so, I heard, "…I know…" echo out of her choked up throat. "…I know…" she breathed out again, and it sounded like she was laughing sadly. "God, do I know." Again she wailed out, pounding her fist onto the porcelain sink. I looked through the crack in the stall door and noticed her face in the mirror. She was crying, probably silently for those good ten minutes. My heart weakened and as I finally pulled myself out of the stall, she had her head down. Unnoticing to her, I wrapped my arms around her and started the comfort. "Alex…" I whispered sweetly to her, it felt wonderful to be this close to her again. Surprisingly she shrugged me off of her, and turned around.

"Yea, but that's what I get, huh? She said, looking down to the tiled floor, and not into my eyes. "I made you become a jet pilot, every time you see me, you take off in the opposite direction." She sniffed back her tears, trying to buck up and be strong, but I just wrapped my arms back around her.

"No, Alex…it was my doing. Mine all mine." I leaned back from her, giving her the once over. I noticed some things I hadn't noticed all week. She looked like she hadn't been eating, and barely rested. "I guess I made this happen too?" I looked at her with full concern.

She wrapped her arms around herself, hiding her exposed body to my caring eyes. "Whatever Paige, it doesn't matter."

"Fuck that Alex!" I hissed back, "I'm a fucking fool!" I was screaming. "I did this to you? And what? I get off the hook easily for it!" I looked into her eyes, the hollow orbs filling up with more wonderful tears. "I said you were nothing! And I'm going to get away with that?" I leaned into her and as I reached my hand to the back of her head, I kissed her. Passionately at first and then more intense with care. When we took a step back from one another, I reluctantly opened my eyes and saw Alex standing there, searching my eyes for some kind of meaning to all of this. I sighed and kissed her again.

"Paige…" she sighed out, I paused, "tell me this is real."

I stepped back again, letting it wash over me the intenseness of us. Thinking back on my speech, I remembered that parents, teachers, loved ones: all lie. And I didn't want to become that for Alex. I turned away from her, and she sobbed.

"I thought so. It's just you like when we kiss, and you think it's fun, I get it." Alex stopped when I took her hand in mine. I laced our fingers together and brought her hand up to my heart.

"Hush, hun. It'll be for the best if you hear me out before you go any further." I noticed Alex's wall tumble a bit, and she looked at me intently. "I've been scared all week. I thought about you constantly, and, and the speech, pretty much wrote about you. And I didn't even realize this till I was up there. Alex, you running after me, even if you thought in the slightest way that I hated you, Alex, you still came here to check on me. You come to my rescue all the time, and here I am, in all my glory, asking you to forgive a silly girl. One who wants something more with you, and, to, to not pretend that everything is fine without you. Because nothing has felt right since I told Hazel you meant nothing. And in a way, that's right."

Alex stopped and looked at me, baffled and a little hurt.

I continued. "You mean so much more."

I entitled this story "Confetti Wires" because of Paige's speech. There's no such thing as Confetti Wire and there's no such of the things mentioned in her speech. Ie: Santa, the Eater Bunny, and the Tooth Fairy. Also underling message that there's no limits on who or how you can love.


End file.
